Movie Review: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012)

So it seems to be that Peter Jackson is never going to disappoint me when it comes to transform J.R.R.Tolkien’s book into a movie. He is a directional phenomena.

After an excellent trilogy of The Lord of the Rings over Frodo’s quest of Ringing, now it’s about a Hobbitual experience about Frodo’s uncle Bilbo which stages 60 years earlier of LOTR advents.

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Bilbo is about to celebrate a ‘nelson’ and makes up his mind to pen his own adventure for Frodo. He begins to ink with a place called ‘Lonely Mountain’, where Dwarf King Thror clements a welfare state. This is the golden period in Lonely Mountain, when it’s people are gay and wealthy, where no darkness empark until the arrival of Smaug, the dragon. Smaug occupies and forces the dwarves to settle out of Lonely Mountain. King Thror’s grandson Thorin watches the army of Elves standing nearby but not coming to rescue them which makes him hideous of Elves.

Enters the writer, half a century years old uncle Bilbo, living in Shire. He meets the wizard, Gandalf the Grey but is unpleasant to see him. Gandalf hosts a dinner party at his home to Thorin and his dwarves to his surprise and without his permission. Gandalf reveals the mystery of all this on Bilbo is to recruit him as ‘burgler’ in Thorin’s army of dwarves to fight and enter the Lonely Mountain. First, he refuses but later on accepts the offer. This is Bilbo marching towards unexpected journey where many adventures welcome him like their horses captured by the Trolls, fight of Misty Mountains, and battle against the Goblins and the Azog. 

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Famous filmmaker Guillermo del Toro was roped in as the movie’s director but later on Peter Jackson replaced him. The principal photography (shooting) of this first installment of The Hobbit began from March 2011 and ended in July 2012 with a filming period of 266 days. The whole movie is picturised in New Zealand.

Howard Shore, who produced one of the most excellent music scores of the last decade in LOTR Trilogy, returns as the leading musician for The Hobbit Trilogy. Few actors reprise their LOTR roles, most significantly 91-year-old Christopher Lee as Saruman The White.

The first installment has grossed $1 billion. The movie was nominated in 3 Academy Awards and BAFTA Awards each. The Middle-Earth story will proceed on December 2013. 

Rating: 7/10

 

When Batting Woes… When Batting Foes….

4th of June, 2013 | cricinfo.com 

William Shakespeare’s “Comedy of Errors” 

By: Iain O’ Brien, Sharda Ugra, Jarrod Kimber and Jonathan Harris-Bass

Why: They said PAKISTAN ARE FAVORITES for ‘ICC last CHAMPIONS TROPHY’

Wait, let me wipe my glass or rub my both eye-balls…. oh that heading says PAKISTAN ARE FAVORITES (NOTTTTTTTT)

 

Within 165 hours……………….

PAKISTAN OUT OF COMPETITION losing both group stage games against Roach Indies and Hashim Africa.

 

11 Days Later…………..

Oh hang on! Pakistan actually lost all 3 games. India defeated them. (tough predictions innit?)

 

HERE THEY COME!!!!

Now players are returning back to where they belong and reminds me the metamorphic incidents, when the same team arrived to the airport from the very same country from also an ICC recognized tournament almost 14 years ago and were received by their supporters so warmly that the players became temporary hostages at their own yard :P 

That time, they reached the Final. This time, hmmmm okay so worst scenarios are about to be trolled as to ‘mother of God’ kinda incidence that both the tournaments I mention were played in Nawaz Sharif’s era :P So the weapons are planned to attack every single player from top to bottom at the airport.

But before you get so senti-mental to be forced to use the weapons, let me clear you that according to Pakistan Bureau of Statistics (PBS), the price of tomato has increased by 61% by January against December and if I am not wrong, than the price per kg is sold at Rs.72 till March. Also back in December 2012, according to The Nation, eggs prices reached Rs.130 per dozen, I repeat… Rs.130 per dozen!!! Keeping the prices in mind, how many dozens of eggs and kgs of tomatoes are you going to weaponise on Green Army *cough*.

A country hit by 7.1% inflation by January and recent results of general elections of May, it is better not to consider using weapons of mass frustration on them. Oh by the way! petrol price per liter has been increased by Rs. 2.18 with immediate effect since June 1. Nayyy that is also not a solution.  So just leave it, and take it as a ridiculous heritage of unpredictable cricketing history. 

Either the king delivers his speech or cheetah runs over a deer, don’t :S at me. All I meant to say is either we bat first or try to chase the target, the team will remain in inflation and depression. Inflation??? Yeah the rising of adrenalin, an increase of required run-rate, the breaking of patience… Depression??? Nothing but your F.O.W. (Frustrated of World OR Fall of Wickets). 

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PAKISTAN TOUR TO ENGLAND!!!

It seems that the team has established a tradition of making the England tour unforgettable, memorable and even disposable. 1992 England tour reminds you British press accusing ball tampering over 2-Ws and umpire Palmer throwing sweater on Aqib Javed. 1999 World Cup features unarguably the best squad of Pakistan ever played but horrors of Finals might not escape from memories. 2006 England tour is about Yusuf’s heroics but more in history will memo you Inzi-Hair controversy. 2009 will be Pakistan’s finest moment in England with WorldT20 title but in next 12 months returning England, Pakistan faces their worst nightmare of Spot-Fixing Controversy. And now they are out of group stage….

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PAK-INDIA BATTING ANALYSES!!!

Now, Pakistan has played 791 ODIs in 40 years, winning 423 games with success rate of 55% (still better than India and West Indies). But when it comes to batsman’s conversion of their 50’s into 100’s, they are too lazy, or too aggressive :P In 791 ODI games, Pakistan has so far produced 155 individual hundreds. So Pakistan takes 5 ODI matches to witness an individual batsman scoring a century which is not healthy at all. If you compare their conversion with India’s batting, the difference in stats surprisingly is not that large enough. India has 203 individual hundreds in 820 ODI games, which means that India has to wait 4 ODI matches to see their batsman hitting a hundred. If you apply this in current scenario, you will understand that we obviously witness more Indian hundreds than Pakistani hundreds, and still not a large difference in stats. Since 2009, Pakistan hit only 14 hundreds as compared to India’s 41. So Pakistan was somewhere enriched with huge batting talents somewhere in the middle of  past cricketing era where Pakistan surely scored a lot of hundreds. 

You can make a simple guessing as when Pakistanis ever hit so many hundreds. Top 5 Pakistani centurions have 4 players belonging to almost same badge (Saeed Anwar 20, Ijaz 10, Inzamam 10, Ramiz 9). So this shows a consistency and selection of batting line-up sought to be in 90’s.  This wasn’t seen in 2000’s as the 3 major names in batting line-up we ever knew were Inzi-Yusuf-Younis. Fluctuations in batting order was widely seen, many a time game plan was changed. Saeed Anwar himself had opened with more than dozens of openers. India, never suffered this dilemma as their batting order framework plan was pretty mature. They boosted their master batsman Sachin Tendulkar to bat at no.4 in Test in almost whole of his career and open the innings in ODI with most mature and talented names in Jadeja, than Sidhu, than Saurav dada, later Viru and sparingly Gambhir. Even hundreds in them had no single era, their top 7 centurions all belong to both decades. 

Pakistan amazingly has 19 instances of 2 batsmen hitting hundred in same ODI inning (as compared to India’s 23 :S ) So when did Pakistan ever hit 2 hundreds in same inning so often? Because nowadays we don’t watch a lot of Pakistani hundreds. Between the period Dec.1982-April.1994, there were 13 instances in ODI cricket of 2-hundreds an inning, in which 8 belonged to Pakistan and only 1 to India. You may understand, how things changed since Sachin brought up his 1st ODI hundred in 80 ODIs that same year 1994 and he and India never looked back.

With greater strength towards hundreds is required, ducking your inning shows inconsistency in any batting order. India has suffered only 385 duck outs in 820 ODIs, which means Indian batting card has a batsman dismissed on nought after every 2 ODIs. But Pakistan is worthless in scorecard when it comes to ducks. They have 479 ducks in 791 ODIs, so Pakistan is close like 1.65 ODI inning to launch a ducky. Infact Shahid Afridi (29) and Wasim Akram (28) sits at no.2 and no.3 respectively in most ODI ducks in career.

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WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ONNNN??

Too many records and history speaking right!!!! The point to depict the real problem in the team is not only the lacking of batting strength. It requires a lot of grooming and potential which becomes a tradition of producing your finest batsman with the blazing blade in his bat. You don’t fully justify a boy who dreams to play for his team, and after few failures, he is thrown out no matter how much immense quality his batting can gift his team to an extent of winning.

Domestic infrastructure is the need as your home is your backbone. You have to make more stadiums and frame them to international cricketing standards. Alright international cricket is not returning which do hurts but at least you can introduce your brightest prospects to the outside world by selecting them and give them a chance they deserve. In last few years, Pakistan has marketize their batting talents telecasting them on private channels. Now we know our domestic cricket more than before. So we are more capable of arguing the improper system of selection. Pakistan still has 2 years in upcoming World Cup and selection committee still have time to come back to senses.

Things may go wrong if most important steps are not taken right now. After a disastrous Champions Trophy, PCB should either fire the whole selection committee or warn them to make selection of squad on merit. My personal opinion lies entirely different from the basic cricketing systems availing presently. If I was in cricketing board power, I would make the Captain of the team, the Chief Selector. The reason is simple, only the Captain of the ship knows how to handle the pirates. To broad the concept of captaining, ‘leadership’ is what polishes a man from immature to maturity. It is the Captain who should select the squad, because he know his men are what capable of. 

 

WHAT SQUAD SHOULD PAKISTAN SELECT?

The DNA of batting shall be changed ASAP. The hurdles should be erased now. I strongly condemn of keeping players like Iron Fart, Shoaib Mirza, Kam-run Khatmal in the team. They are good for nothing. Out of these 3, put Shoaib’s name only in T20Is. Hafeez-Jamshed pairing is suitable for one-dayers with Ahmed Shahzad as 3rd option on the bench. You have 2 good names for no.3 and they are Azhar Ali and Asad Shafiq. Pick any one and reserve the other on the bench. Our RobinHood Panday, the captain should promote himself at no.4 with hugely talented Haris Sohail and all-rounder Hammad Azam to be compulsorily encouraged at no.5 and no.6. Then comes wicket keeper, so Umar Akmal can be utilized. Last 4 positions are all regular bowlers and it’s time to groom left-arm spinner Raza Hasan for near future who will presently assist Saeed Ajmal. The remaining fast bowlers should be Irfan-Junaid.

So the four benches!!! 3rd opener Ahmad Shahzad and no.3 Azhar or Asad should sit. Team should give one more chance to Fawad Alam, who resembles as same profile performer as India’s Ravindu Jadeja. Both were criticized in initial phase of their career but India explore the wonders in Jajeda and framed him in regular line-up with orthodox spinning and brilliant fielding, he is now capable of winning matches. On other hand, Pakistan is yet to treasure his talent. 4th bencher should be a fast bowler, where Pakistan has various options in Ali’s like Asad, Anwar and Rahat or Ehsan Adil. Shahid Afridi and Umar Gul should concentrate in T20Is.

My Squad: Mohammad Hafeez, Nasir Jamshed, Azhar Ali, Asad Shafiq, Misbah-ul-Haq (C), Haris Sohail, Hammad Azam, Umar Akmal (WK), Raza Hasan, Saeed Ajmal, Mohammad Irfan, Junaid Khan, Ahmad Shahzad, Fawad Alam and one more fast bowler.

 

Sleeping time. Wanna join Green Army??? Contact these guys below…

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Movie Review: Aashiqui 2 (2013)

Aashiqui (Do Number) is about a rise and fall of voice between the lovers. It is like Keith Urban losing his edge for Kree Harrison to convince she is the winner but not Candice Glover. The movie concept is loosely based on Charles Chaplin’s Limelight.

So there is a sharaabi Rockstar JJ, oops I mean RJ (Rahul Joker), who is losing grip on his sensational singing career, losing the audience, losing fans but gaining the attention of a bar singer Arohi. He falls in love with her while drunk, and his brain is too alive in the morning to remember he has to release her from bar manager to start a new singing career he has promised to help her.

Then is understood what is gonna happen next. Rahul makes her successful, she signs a contract with his uncle’s T-Series. More typical scenes are obviously expected to follow, she gets nominated on her first musical awards night and supriiiissseeeee!!! guess who wins??? obviously who else then Arohi. Then jotshi baba Mr. Happy Banana of Delhi Belly predicts the turnout of careers of both lovers.

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Then the reversal of fortunes like Priyanka-Kangana’s Fashion as Arohi’s career touch heights and Rahul suffers serious downfall but Devdasful commitment with daaru remains fix. Their relation fluctuates with time. 

A pretty ordinary script with less-then-average performances. Aditya-Shraddha as Rahul-Arohi don’t even look a charming on-screen chemistry altogether, their acting is like a premature student put on test in medical exams. A mouth-quarrel between Rahul and his friend Vivek in a party scene is enough evidence of expecting a hot-temper bursting scene but falling below than expected.

Somebuddy should ask why Mohit Suri termed the movie as a sequel to Aashiqui as there was nothing to continue and was framed with a new package. The climax of the movie was much understood after noticing all recent Bhatt intense romantic movies. Music of the movie is what makes the movie a blockbuster and “Tum Hi Ho” is Mithoon’s one of finest numbers of his musical career. But the musical comparison of both Aashiquis may come to debate but my humble opinion is that score of original Aashiqui was way way way better.

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Movie Status: Drinking alcohol and loving a girl can never work together… Go to hell, you are drunk!!!!

Ratings: 3/10

 

Movie Review: Kai Po Che (2013)

Dil Chahta Hai, Rock On and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara all buddy movies had one thing common. All were urbanized. Abhishek Kapoor, who himself directed ‘Rock On’, used Chetan Bhagat’s novel ‘The 3 Mistakes of my Life’ as center-base and produced 3 middle-class Gujrati friends to mark a highly exceptional movie with an inspiring bond of friendship with a passage of time running with a limit. UTV Motion Pictures rocks again with ‘Kai Po Che’.

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First, what is ‘Kai Po Che’? This is a Gujrati phrase that ‘I have cut the kite’. There is the only kite cutting scene where a friend roars up the title name of movie otherwise the name itself doesn’t really justify with the story at all. 

The movie is set in Ahmadabad, Gujarat back in 2000. The core characters are 3 childhood friends; Govind, Omkar (Omi) and Ishaan (Ish).

  1. Govind is the smartest of all, educated and well wit in accounts and plans for a business venture of sports accessories.
  2. Ishaan is highly ambitious cricket lover who suffered his cricketing time due to politics but want to produce highly talented cricketers from different districts.
  3. Omkar is the middleman between the two who is a source of financing their dreams into reality.

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Omi is nephew of Hindu politician Bittu mama and convinces him for a loan to get a place to open the shop. They get a shop for a business and a ground behind to train cricket to young lads. Ishan finds a richly talented hitter in a Muslim boy, Ali, belonging to a father running his political party in their community’s interest and in rivalry of Bittu mama’s party.

As the business grows, they open one more shop in a commercial mall. Meanwhile, Ishaan convinces Govind to teach his sister, Vidya, maths as exams are close. The teacher-student fells in love but hide their relation.

2001 is the year of a massive tragedy of earthquake in Gujarat where they lose their newly acquired shop in commercial mall. Ishaan is so much in Ali’s family and his community that he helps them find their shelter after their heavy loss. Whereas Omi begins working in his mama’s party and dedicated fully on Hindu’s interests. Ishaan and Omi’s friendship hits on communal issues.

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The Gujarat elections begin and Omi goes busy in mama’s politics. Ali’s father surprisingly wins elections over Bittu’s party. During political campaign, Bittu sends kar sevaks to Ayodhya to Ram Mandir which includes Omi’s parents. Then news of Godhra Train Massacre hits all over Gujarat with a conspiracy that large no of Muslims burnt the train with all kar sevaks alive.

This news coveys a message of bloody riots to happen in Gujarat between Hindus and Muslims. The bond of Govind, Omi and Ishaan hiccups in 2002 Gujarat riots with Vidya’s love and Ali’s cricket in the cradle of justice.

The movie is a remarkable storytelling and pacefully directed by Abhishek. Raj Yadav is one acting name with a lot of talent who got popular movies like Love Sex and Dhoka, Gangs of Wasseypur 2 and Talaash in the beginning. With role of Govind, he do justice. Amit Sadh and Sushant Singh Rajput, both marks debut as Omi and Ishan respectively and comes surprisingly from soap operas. Amrita Puri  who was Sonam’s friend in ‘Aisha’ makes a good role as Ish’s sister and Govind’s love interest.

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All the cast justified their role but I will rate Sushant and Manav Kaul’s roles as Ishaan and Bittu high as both were brilliant. Stage actor is terrific with a balance of his justification with pros and cons. Songs are well picturised and background score is tuning. The novel-based movie is of no nonsense but widely realistic and acceptable e.g. Indian cricket kits used in 2000 or Ishaan’s own cricketing skills make you think if he really is a player but he got 4 months cricket training under 2 coaches to make his role perfect. All homes are real where the characters lived showing simplicity of Gujarat life.

Movie Status: One of best Hindi movies of 2013

Rating: 8.6/10

Movie Review: Vicky Donor (2012)

John Abraham’s debut production venture is ‘Vicky Donor’ which has a tagline “I am a sperm donor”. A Hindi movie introduces a rare and daring subject in 21st century modern-social South Asian society moviegoers but thought-provoking simultaneously.

To make the movie looks interesting for viewers and worth-profiting from viewer’s middle-age pockets, and also to reduce the establishment of kingdom of boredom towards less-bearing serious subject, the director chose the romantic-comedy flavor to convey the message in stimulating way…

By intending to watch, you think it’s a naughty B-movie about sex and sperm, but watching this movie will in fact propel you to do bad things in good way for others. (I say bad thing in a sense that from religious sense, masturbation is unlawful in my religion, Islam)

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Coming back to movie, Vicky is a Punjabi munda who is jobless but not colorless. His widowed mom Mrs. Arora runs a beauty parlor. Vicky is caught in fertility doctor Dr.Baldev Chaddha’s eye and offers him money to donate sperm. He refuses the offer and after his many efforts, Vicky finally agrees. Meanwhile, he finds his girlfriend, a Bengali banker and marries after convincing their cultured conservative parents. Watch yourself now to whom will he donate the sperm? :P

Brilliant direction from Shoojit Sircar after 7-year comeback from 2005-movie ‘Yahaan’. Very impactful dialogues penning by journalist Juhi Chaturvedi. Movie see 2 superb debuts; popular TV presenter Ayushmaan Khurana & model-come-TV actress beautiful Yami Gautam. Simply awesome acting and good acting prospects. One more cast is important to mention who was the main cast, culprit and life savior at the same time, Anu Kapoor showed his versatility in acting like always. ‘Pani Da Rung’ was obviously the best number, in fact the movie is one of best I have seen in 2012.

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Sometimes the story is everything. A mere 5-crore-rupees movie earned 50 crore rupees due to a rare subject on which film makers dare to make film due to less attraction of viewers and low profits.

Movie Status: Gives social message “masturbate for others” ;P

Originally written: 2nd of Nov, 2012

Rating: 6/10

 

Film Review: Nanjing! Nanjing! (2009)

City of Life and Death is a 2009 Chinese historical drama based on ‘Battle of Nanjing‘ and its aftermath which is famously known as Nanjing Massacre. The battle was fought in 1937 between Japan and China during 2nd Sino-Japanese War. When Japanese invaded the Nanjing city, they showed no mercy on Chinese as massacre began in next 6 weeks which included mass murders, human tortures, slavery and most specifically war rapes.

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A German businessman and Nazi party member, John Rabe, ran Nanjing Safety Zone, where thousands of Chinese women, children, elders and wounded soldiers took refuge. This safety zone was created by International Committee for the Nanking Safety Zone. Despite all the efforts, the Japanese soldiers forcefully entered the zone for raping Chinese female refugees. This was repeated numerous times as women later on decided to cut their hairs and dress like men to save their lives. Later on the Japanese officer ordered at least 100 women to join Japanese camps as ‘comfort women’. And the massacre moved on…

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John Rabe got orders from Germany to return and stop his activities of running the safety zone. His secretary Tang left his daughter to die and sister-in-law rape. While leaving the zone, Tang, at the last moment decided to stay and let his wife move in order to make way for a Chinese soldier. Tang’s wife revealed she was pregnant and later on, Tang was executed.

Can’t believe that Chinese cinema can be up to a merit of amazing cinematic substance as brilliant direction and realistic screenplay saw the movie meeting commercial and international success. The movie won many international awards in film festivals. A terrific period masterpiece.

Rating 7.6/10

 

Movie Review: Paan Singh Tomar (2012)

The movie is biography over an unsung Indian hero-cum-villain, a story moving from Usain Bolt to Veerappan and the movie changing its flavor in 3 phases (soldier, athlete & bandit). In 1949, he joins army and stuns his seniors in his athletics skills. He wins gold medal in Indian National Games 7 years in a row. Participates in 1958 Asian Games in Tokyo but fails.

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To his misery, a journey of a soldier who willed to fight war but the law (athlete soldiers don’t participate in war) made him low. His commitment towards athletics knew no bound and at age 32, breaks his own national steeplechase record. Soon he retires, village feud heats and leave the village and grows his own gang to avoid a drop of blood on his family. 

Here begins Bandit King, and Tigmanshu Dhulia successfully reminds this bandit phase of movie towards Shekar Kapoor’s famous ‘Bandit Queen’. At that time, Tigmanshu was casting director of the movie and now brings more charm in directing this phase. Paan tries to resolve the issue of land acquisition with his relative Bhanwar Singh but fails. He even calls District collector but to no avail. Infact Bhanwar singh and his goons attack on Paan family in his absence but family escapes leaving his mother killed. In 1979, Paan becomes bandit and raises his army to bring terror in Chambal valley.

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Revenge, gunshots, crews of gangs & dialogues are touchy and realistic. Rarely have I seen the leading cast dying not in front of camera. Mahie’s simplicity in Paan’s role twinkles but the limelight is Irrfan Khan with a loud-voiced bravo performance. He surpassed Paan Singh’s legacy from his acting towards a height. The movie I believe is one of best biographic movies ever made in Bollywood and such an excellent direction was expected as Tigmanshu is a modern history-graduate + researcher, and it took him 14 years since shooting of Bandit Queen to collect/research Paan Singh.

One of best movies of 2012 indeed….

Movie Status: Govt should grow up and respect the sportsman before they disrespect you

Rating: 7.7

Originally written on 5th of November, 2012

 

Movie Review: The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

I always believed that Joker-inspired ‘The Dark Knight’ is the best Batman movie, oh sorry, the best superhero movie I have ever seen in my life. But Christopher Nolan has changed, not my mind, but my heart to speak out that I was wrong. The best was yet to come.

The movie plots 8 years after Harvey Dent’s death when under Dent Act, GCPD (Gotham City Police Deptt) gets supreme power to cntrl+alt+del the organized crime in Gotham City. This is a time when Bruce Wayne don’t entertain anyone and lives as hermit, and the batman legacy is finished. His business rival John Daggett forwards his assistant to deal with the meow-clothing Selina Kyle to bring Mr. Wayne’s fingerprints to erase her criminal record in program Slate. Bane, the Gotham’s reckoning masked man, hits the Gotham Stock Exchange and uses Wayne’s fingerprints in a transaction to make Wayne bankrupt. On the other hand, Commissioner Gordon appoints officer John Blake a detective.

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In fear of Daggett’s take on his fusion reactor project, Wayne convinces Wayne Enterprise board member Miranda Tate to acquire the company. Later on, Bat Wayne fells under Bane’s trap and throws him in a prison-hell far from Gotham. Wrath of Bane begins as he isolates Gotham and attack. Somehow, the Batman escapes the prison-hell and tries to save Gotham from Bane’s terror and destruction. And then begins a civil war between Gotham’s reckoning and Gotham’s beckoning. 

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Go in depth wherever you want to judge a movie of it’s class. Many of scenes are finishing with raised eyebrows. Action & Words, both are louder together i.e. dynamic actions and powerful dialogues. Revenge has hunger of strike.

Hans Zimmer’s finest music score ever, I don’t think there is any need of nominations for music score in Academy Awards ceremony this night at Dolby Theatre, he is clear cut winner. As expected, performances were no surprise as it was expected that reprising roles will obviously have charm along with new roles. 

Veteran actors Gary Oldman, Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine were all furnishing roles like before. As expected at the announcement of cat-woman role to gorgeous Anne Hathaway, she surpassed and was the perfect-match role. Christian Bale as always have been a brilliant actor but as a superhero, the reprising role in this episode proves to be the toughest and challenging from the former one. 

Then comes the best role and acting what I see is Tom Hardy with a distinguished role of the masked man, Bane, full of applause. So Heath Ledger’s Joker is not the end as powerful villainous appearance. Seems like a trend Nolan has begun to show Hollywood industry that memorable villainous roles will be there to remember all the time in future. Unarguably one of most powerful villainous act by Tom Hardy.

Last 30 minutes are exceptional and brilliantly directed by Nolan and terrific suspense to end the batman trilogy. The movie never lets you down and keeps impressing as almost 3-hour american movie is never going to create boredom. Simply one of greatest movies I have even seen.

Rating: 8.7/10

Originally written on 7th December, 2012

 

The Green Downfall & Fish-Slapping Dance

Theory in existence, Corruption in persistence…

Muslims ruled the subcontinent for 1000 years… really?? I don’t know… Anyhow the Britishers came to teach you the difference between leadership and dictatorship with every fish caught and stored in their ship. You were ruled by them and by years oops I mean by decades to come, you successfully certified (dignified) yourself to be ruled in ages and generations to come and salute.

After major efforts of freedom fighters of Control-Alt-Delete the Britishers, you got inter-dependence in 1947. Later on, your father left the nation in higgledy piggledy and there was a big ” :S ” over leadership to fall over someone’s shoulder. In next 65 years, your political system and leadership become laughing stock (of exchange) in many regions of human globe of invest-meant. 

More to a mockery of a joke is that it was hard to find a human being to lead the country with green dignity. So the animals used human brain and ruled you big time. The political world and state of monarchies (and anarchies) expected separation-demanding people to produce green merlins to justify their separate land’s existence. But instead of green merlin, you in fact produced green chaplin, sometimes green dublin and even green goblin.

So the leadership was tossed between two kinds of rulers. The one who are in military (with all their military ranks embarked from Britishers) and the politicians who are greedy of chair to build their own monarchy and throne their generations by mimics, I mean gimmicks (excuse my heart).

Ruling of country became unstable and its all after assassination at Company Bagh, Rawalpindi in 1951, that a heritage of ‘fish-slapping dance’ begin. The first presidency was proved a vehicle without engine and after many coronary bypass surgeries, the patient chose to share his bed with another patient in 1958. In almost 3 weeks, both president and army chief played fish-slapping dance on each other. Soon after mr.president finally drown in water with a heavy halibut-punch, your military began to rule for next 13 years. So martial law was imposed on country (3 months after 1st Nigar Film Awards).

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Next 2 presidential elections in 1960 and 1964 witnessed the same army chief, so no challenge of defeating him in fish-slapping dance until in 1969, the guy of his same army rank punched him Halibut-fish. 1970 witnessed your inaugural gene-rall elections. In order to stabilize the heritage of dance, sardine-fish are distributed in Eastenders while halibut-fish in Westenders. A year later, ‘Finding Nemo’ is released on December,1971.

Toss changed the fate as the man, who founded Pakistan Peoples Party in 1967, got the leadership as the Halibut-fish remained in his hands for next 6 years. A warning Kiss over nuclear dilemma in 1976 was enough to pen his book in prison cell. In 1977, 9 political parties challenged him to win the fish-slapper over them. Then introduction of rigga-rigga was rumored in general elections which controversially outraged the opponents of losing the contest without slapping him. The army interfered again and martial law imposed for the 3rd time with its leader serving the country for longest term. 

After the plane crash in Bahawalpur in 1988, the leadership had enjoyed (suffered) almost 30 years of fish-slapping dance. But this time, the transfer of leadership suffered a dissolute passion in shape of disease which spread in all the political parties. That disease was Osgood–Schlatter, which broke all the political movement to knees.

Here comes the voice of anarchy, I mean monarchy (excuse my heart again) as the 1st lady on earth is historically appointed as PM of Muslim state, I repeat… ‘Muslim’ state!! She leads the country twice but with incomplete period of time due to dismissal from president. The reasons were simple, Osgood-Schlatter disease made the government unstable enough to not be able to stand on their feet. Surgeons had pre-informed the patient for knee-surgery but she didn’t listen to him.

In chair winning race after plane crash of 1988, further more animals were found in different regions. One city saw a revolution where a minor student organization transform to a major ethnic organization which birth a major party based on their roots to be realized as rejected in many controversial events in the past. The other city came on major hold by a man jumping in politics only to get his family property back snatched by the past government. He expanded his business and political roots stabilized in his region but the disease had no limits.

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Finally in 1999, fish-slapping dance contest was fought between the-then leader and the mercenary. The incidents matched tribute of first ever dance put to formal in 1958, as the army kicked the man the same way and 4th Martial Law was imposed on country. Next 8 years, the man in army boots never let anyone dance with sardine-fish on him. Big names left the country, years later they came back. Even the ‘justice league’ of Pakistan (coughs) were put on test the patience. The mercenary stepped down after 2008 general elections and the country witnessed a real animal winning presidential elections. The country witnessed no-holds-barred in the most corrupted and shameless government ever came to run a 5-year term. Osgood-Schlatter was on it’s Everest-peak and all the fish had commit suicide just at the announcement of new president being a dog.

In near future, there is a chance that finally the fish will not be tortured, voters won’t bother fingering when thumb is gifted to mark on hope, international cricket may resume, international-begging may stop, minorities may not suffer, Baluchistan may not be forgotten. Because in these 5 testing years, a major voice became nationwide revolution of change and call for unity in development phase. The youth get inspired from all corners and patriotism level got exposure to height after long time and lanky wait. Recent elections shook the momentum as the evidence caught, proved the general elections one of worst rigga-rigga display of all-time. The old gimmicks had applied to subjugate the land but the harsh truth for all fish-slapping dancers is that change has changed the change.

“A revolution can be neither made nor stopped. The only thing that can be done is for one of several of its children to give it a direction by dint of victories.” _ Napolean Bonaparte

 

The Three Witches and No-Ball Dynasty

Abominable or Adorable? The slavery of justice is impeccable…

Once, the 3 witches, who prophesied Macbeth of his becoming king, returned and landed to earth after 4 centuries, this time at Iqbal Park in Lahore. Their ears heard something familiar which was related to them, prophecy. The man on stage was addressing his nation, talking about his movement, cheering his supporters and embarking his wisdom. 

Somehow, the witches stunned when they heard that specific word, Tsunami, which roared his supporters nationwide. They were worried about these people, because last time the Tsunami ever severely hit was a year ago in Japan with the-then over 15,000 innocent lives officially graved. And these participating in park were like ten-fold but they were to their surprise, gay and excited.

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The witches moved to other parts of Pakistan with mixed responses to their wonder. They spot a boy gazing at them. Like if he was about to shout, the witches immediately flew to him to calm the closet. When witches confirmed their personification, the boy spoke up that the play, Macbeth, is taught in his school and always wished to see the witches in reality. When witches asked for the reason of such wish, the boy replied of their importance of prophecies playing the core part in ruling of Kingdom indirectly, as he wished to see them back to give prophesy this time under right hands for his country’s defense.

The witches were impressed but they convinced him of their return to a piece on earth was just under their observation of watching numerous Macbeths who don’t even need any prophecy. The boy wept and ran away, the witches kept touring. They found the army general waiting for martial law, chief justice of the highest court actually waiting for justice, medical students protesting outside their university, engineering students seeking for jobs, TV anchors talking about patriotism, celebrities endorsing shame, mullahs arguing with mullahs as moo-laws and the politicians doing everything but politics. Quite boozy-cal to upcoming elections to decide the country’s fate where such incidents happen. Oh by the way, the witches crossed the line towards north to Waziristan. The militants opened fire on them by taking them as ‘Human Drones’, the witches somehow escaped unhurt.

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All three witches now considered the boy’s wish to come true and challenged each other to prophesy the exact fate of the country. If foretold correct, will vanish her 2 partners forever;

  • The 1st witch prophesied: “The most seasoned campaign of sitters (but not seaters) will somehow win the contest and struggle to lead”
  • The 2nd witch prophesied: “The most trusted campaign who voice for reformation will convincingly win the race and dare to lead”
  • The 3rd witch prophesied: “The good and the bad will win together but work together in opposite ways until the third force intervene”

Normally, when elections are uphold or behold anywhere in any region (you may say legion), whatever you predict or foretell, you actually get results. A country in state of plagiarism but morally adapted to pluralism easily lumberjacks the nation. The school of thought which at least develops interest in book-reading and on-air heated argument, becomes school of fought. Living in this country or being of this country, you are in a state of mind where you are disturbing or disturbed. So do knot disturb.

Soon as the prophecies and results of elections are revealed, Hecate has fallen unconscious at unknown location whereas the witches are yet to decide whether to vanish or not. So after so many no-balls, the ball is yet to deliver to complete the over as you know what I mean. The latest but traditional news is that army general is still waiting for next martial law. 

 

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